Date: Tue, 18 Mar 2008 00:25:47 +0000
 

On On ya Fucks - here's another shitty Hash Trash for another Virgin Hare Shitty trail.  Deathwish and I arrive promptly, and have a beer at the Railroad House (Yummy wings too). 

 

 We regoup outside to see Hares, OE and Shrinky Dink, who both have hands stained green. That means either they've  been getting too  close with a Hash Whore, or we get to have Shitty green Beer.   Fart, Delhia, Needle Dick, Just Allen, Trunk, Uncle Fester, and Virgin Just Mark are awaiting the start of the trail.  Everyday Asshole finally arrives with the Beer (Thank you Asshole), driving a beautiful new truck that he'll be paying off for the next 6 years.  Cindy Lou Ho and Just Norm cum (aggghhhgh) shortly after in a Van, that they live in down by the river.  Wild Cherry pulls up, and without cookies (cheap bastard-must be fuckin broke after Free Beer for all the Hashers).  Just Corinda Cums (arrghghgh) lookin Hash Fine in a very short kilt. 

 

Keg is tapped, and circle up you fuckin fucks.  Cindy Lou Ho and Just Norm announce that they made Just Mark Cum (arrgghhhghh).  Not only is it a Van down by the River, but it's also a FuckMobile.  We drink beer, waste time, Shrinky Dink explains the marks, and we're off at a Reading record half hour late.  Yes, you read it right Reading, a half hour late.

 

The Pack limps off at a Hangover Pace down the railroad tracks - old men in walkers could outrun these fat fucks.  On and On we go, until we hear the sweet sweet call of Beer Near!!!  Whoo Hoo Beer Near!  Did you say Near?  Where the fuck is the beer?  The whole pack searches, and finally finds it, deep in the woods about a couple hundred feet from the BN.  OE, you lazy fuck, you need to train your virgin Hares a little better. 

 

Green Beer - yum - Deathwishes lips are still green.  The generous Hares ensured that a couple of cans of Old Mud were included for Fart - Ah, Fart Love.  Needle Dick and Just Allen sneak away before the pack finishes the beer, must be a little quiet time needed for these guys.  Shrinky Dink, better watch out for JA, I think he might have been honkin on the needle (Argghghhhgh).  Fart finds a really cool ball - Hash Treasure!

 

 Half the Pack has already left us - you non drinking pussies.  YOB, Deathwish, Trunk, Fart, Wild Cherry, Just Corrinda, EveryDay, and Delhia stay to finish the beer.  That's because we're hashing mother fuckers.  On On to the next Beer Check!!!

 

The wiley Hares have set quite a trail including cross checks, and false trails, but we find the next beer check.  An impromtu check in the woods, at an abandoned house.  Immediately Deathwish climbs onto the top deck of the house, and Fart soon joins him.  Amongt the hysterical barking of Delhia, Fart and Deathwish climb onto the roof of the house.  What now?  OE throws Fart's Hash ball at them, but of course he misses since he drank the entire keg, and the ball goes through a window of the dilapidated house.  Nice shot you drunk fucker.  We liked that ball. 

 

Now how to retrieve the ball?   Because it has to be retrieved.  It just wouldn't make sense to leave it there.  The window is 15 feet up, and all other entrances are boarded up.  Trunk finds two 2X4's and leans them diaganolly against the house while Deathwish balances himself and walks up the board into the house.  He only almost fell three or four times.  Really thought this would be the Hospital Trip Hash for me.  So how the fuck to get out?   He disappears from the window, and returns, with a ladder.  It's a little short, but gets DW down safely.  Lucky Bastard.

 

On and On and On again to the next Beverage stop.  Just about 50 feet away, straight up through shale piles, we find a very green, serioulsy vile smelling liquid.  Could it be Shrinky Dink and OE piss?  Nah, something of the apple and hard liquor variety.  Drink drink drink, and off we go again.

 

On and On again.  Half the pack continues to follow the trail, while the remainder of the pack decide to go back to the start to partake of the remainder of the keg.   There couldn't have been more beer checks right?  Back at the start, we find Dude Where's My Mullet, who didn't leave Harrisburg until 1:30.  We started late, but not that late.  Also back at the start is YOB, Deathwish, Everyday, Uncle Fester, Trunk, Cindy Lou Ho, and Just Norm (who by the way, went back into the Van, um I mean SuckMoblile - Arrghghgh). 

 

Where's the Hares and the beer?  Shit, there has to be another Beer Check.  So off we go to follow the trail back ward calling No No all the way. 

 

 We meander through a really cool graveyard with crypts, and some guy hanging from a tree.  Coffins, headstones, rotted bodies, and a stage for torturing bad girls and boys are passed (Just Corinda and Trunk display their goodies later).  Trail is running through a  Fuckin cool ass Haunted Hayride site.  We catch up to the pack drinking beer in a nuclear waste site.  Deathwish immediately starts hanging upside down from a suspended wire.  Trunk is jumping off of a platform, and body slamming onto the hood of a pick up truck.  Deathwish  runs on top of stacked barrels, and Trunk starts pushing him off.  Why can't you fuckin fucks get along?

 

Back to circle, and Deathwish RA's.  Hey baby, it's the Reading Hash, not the Harrisburg Hash!!!!  Virgins drink, visitors drink, cheesey poofs fly, blah, blah, blah.  The request for Swing Low is denied by the RA.  You fuck. 

 

Overall, it was a great Hash once again.  I love cumming (AGGGGGGGGGG) to Reading you fuckin fucks!

 

Yeast of Burden